Stare Baby, Stare
I don’t like TV. Or screens in general, really. I could live forever with no TV... but the boys.
My man loves a good screen-veg. If he gets a chance for a down day, Chris likes to turn on the most boring show Netflix has to offer to nap to. (He wakes up if we try to change it to say he was watching it, and it was “pretty interesting”.) He takes brain breaks with an extraordinarily random assortment of YouTube videos. We even have a screensaver playing from our TV when we play music.
We’ve got screen time happening over here.
Benjamin is a very small version of his dad. It’s an answer to my prayers. The name Benjamin means “Son of My Strength”. Before he was born, I told Chris I would be happy for our son to have even a handful of his strength. Chris Ladd has got it going on.
When he was in the womb, he would turn in to Ninja-min when he heard his daddy’s voice. Kicking, dancing, and leaping with excitement. Nothing has changed since our sweet boy entered the world 5 months ago. That boy loves his daddy. He will crane his neck to find his dad when he hears his voice, and Chris has to hide when I’m trying to put him to sleep.
Benjamin can’t help but smile and giggle when he sees his dad. Pure love oozes from both of them and creates a contagious energy. This father-son bond had to be made in heaven.
I ordered a pacifier with a mustache to seal the deal on this little Ladd looking just like his dad.
I lay Benjamin on the floor for tummy time, and he finds a way to maneuver those baby rolls to face any screen or light he can lock into. I plop him into Dad’s lap when he gets fussy in the evenings, and they watch a video together. I’ll admit I’ve had a few outbursts in the past weeks, “BENJAMIN. STOP STARING AT THE SCREENS.” “CHRIS, YOUR BABY HAS A PROBLEM.” He’s a screen junkie. It’s ridiculous.
Benjamin and I stopped our running around today for a little time at dad’s desk. He was so pleased with himself sitting in Dad’s desk. He got busy on the keyboard and relished in the closeness with his father.
Right then and there, I decided to just let him stare.
I know the “they says” say screen time isn’t good for kids. I agree 1,000%.
But Benjamin is looking at what his dad is looking at. His dad spends 97% of his time looking at what really matters to him. He looks first toward God in all things and for every thing. He looks at me with more love and commitment every single day. He looks at his sons and sees potential and promise. He looks at our finances and wonders how we can bless people with them. He looks at a big city and sees how much room there is for hope. He looks at challenges and sees the stage set for a miracle. He looks at trials and sees possibility. He guards his eyes in order to guard his heart. He even chooses the most boring Netflix shows to not chance something risqué flickering across a screen even for a moment.
If a few minutes with his dad and a screen creates a space for Benjamin to learn how to look at all that other stuff too, then it’s more than worth it. I would rather focus on the fact that we have a dad worth staring at. The value of sitting in a relaxed dad’s lap far surpasses all the opinions and statistics about screen time that the screens will tell you about.
So today I decided I’m going to let Benjamin stare at whatever his dad is staring at and hope he starts to look like his dad in the process.
We become what we behold.
Whatever you’re staring at, or maybe who you’re staring with - matters. It’s what you’re becoming. It will shape our families and our futures. Whether it’s Fresh Prince of Bel Air or Ultimate Ninja Warrior, think about what and why you are beholding and if that’s what you want to become.
