I Got a Rolodex
I've found myself accidentally daydreaming about visiting the US lately.
This morning I picked up Benjamin's US passport from the American embassy, and I'm sitting next to a stack of paperwork to apply for my new South African visa right now. It's all still surreal since the 7-year miracle. I haven't crossed an ocean since 2015.
My home is here in South Africa now. My little family was crafted here, but there's something about the place and the people that shaped you while you were still forming. There's something about your mama whose love gave life to your own, whose life taught you how to live yours. There's something about seeing your little sister as a new mommy and laughing through the night with the only person who knows what really happened the day she locked me in the closet while I was babysitting her.
The family I grew up with is spread all over America. Some are in heaven. There is no "home base" for us to gather. It was NaNa's house before. We will probably rent a place to stay when we visit. But, lately, memories of the people, places and things - the nouns of my childhood - have bubbled up from a joyful place in my soul. I think it's hope. Gratitude and hope swirling together in a now unfamiliar dance.
I have so much to thank God for. There are so many people I want to lift up. So many Scripture I want to speak over my family. I don't want to let the busyness of life overshadows the purpose of it all. I prayed and asked God to help me know how I could keep His Word before me and remember to pray for ALL the people I want to pray for in a very practical way.
Almost immediately, I saw a picture in my mind: The house I spent my first 18 years in had a desk nook in the kitchen. It's funny how some of the memories of that house have gone fuzzy, but I clearly remember my mom's giant, well-used Rolodex. It was right next to the answering machine. I can still see her half-cursive, half-print, pencil-only handwriting. You could spin card after card and find everything you needed, names organized alphabetically, of course. I remember every detail of that Rolodex, right down to the tinted cover that enclosed the spinning cards.
Not only did that Rolodex memory conjure up the warmest feeling of home, but it was God answering my prayer in a way that perfectly fit me! I immediately started the search for a Rolodex. Can you believe those are considered vintage now!?! I found ONE in South Africa! I jumped on that treasure. Two days later, I was the proud owner of a new-to-me Rolodex! It is on it's way now to being re-purposed as my prayer wheel.
I love everything about it. It's nowhere near as retro and cool as my mom's, but it does remind me of her. It also reminds me that God is creative and so very personal. He cares about where I come from, the things I care about, and He wants to make it easy to bring heaven down to earth.
He made us to pray. To seek Him, to find Him, and to walk and talk with Him. He stays the same as our seasons of life change, but He always, always, always gives us a way to connect to His steadiness when we ask. I love my prayer wheel on my desk. This is the first time I've had a desk in 13 years. It wouldn't have worked until right now. In other seasons it's been reminders on my phones, post-its on the fridge, or events in my calendar.
What's working for you right now?
PS: You should have seen Lifa's face when I explained what a Rolodex is. Allll the judgment.