God spoke, "Hallelujah" when I asked Him for a word to hold on to for the year 2018. I excitedly deemed it "My Hallelujah Year" and looked forward to the hip-hip-hoorays ahead. That year turned out to be one of the deepest, darkest, and hardest of all the years. There were very few celebratory moments and very many hours spent bowed in desperate prayer.

Wise King Solomon said, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens." (Eccl 3:11) This week felt like all the seasons were happening at once in my house! It was a time for birthday celebrations, gathering of friends, exams, rugby practice, and the flu! I actually thought, "I know King Solomon was busy leading a nation and building the temple, but did he ever try that with sick kids!?!"

My good intentions proved to be feeble this week. My strong will could not hold the line. (And I'm good at making things happen!)

I've been trying to change the way I think about things and rearrange my own priorities. My stubborn plans are the defense while the truth I want to live by is offense. It can be hard to name a victor in an internal battle.

No one imagines themselves in that dark of a place, where every movement and even not moving causes crippling pain. But we've all been there.

If you've followed along with us, you've probably read that Benjamin struggles with an unusual form of autism. We've developed a great support team in the last 12 months, but there is no better support system than his big brother. I just had to sneak a few pictures this morning of this unexplainable love in action.

My 4-year old son is a psalmist in his own right. He creates his own songs and sings wherever we go. He sings stories from the Bible and about his love for Jesus... and sometimes about cats and Hot Wheels. Because he's four.

I love a quiet mornings with my Bible. This week, I read the story of Noah's Ark. Genesis gives an incredible account of when the world was covered with water, when God tried to wash away evil. He painted a rainbow promise in the sky afterwards to testify He would never destroy the world again.

I had a hard time rendering my stubborn heart to God this week. I found myself desperately dwelling on things I hope for rather the His perfect love. I continuously brought my dreams to God but had a hard time leaving them with Him. Like a child, unsure if she has her Father's attention and tugging on His robe to say, "Did you hear me? Are you gonna do it? Is it time yet? When is it going to be time?"

I'm sitting in the counselor’s office at Lifa’s primary school…

Last weekend we remembered a weekend in history that changed everything: the curse reversed, death died, and we were set free forever. On the heels of my Creator shutting down the sun, shaking the earth, and allowing His Son to die for me, I’m still distracted by my struggles and pridefully trying to tackle problems in my own strength.

Today's call to worship is an excerpt from a famous sermon by S.M. Lockridge. Enjoy your day, and remember that Sunday's is a coming! 🙌

I made an angel-friend last year. The kind of friend God sends to you when you need to be seen in a way you can't see yet. I would pump breastmilk in the car on the way to meet her, hold teeny-tiny Wyatt, and drink an extra large coffee while I sniffled and stammered about not knowing how to be a special needs mom. She was the one I could be very raw with and say I didn't WANT to be a special needs mom. I could ask the questions you're not supposed to have and feel all the feelings I didn't think I should feel with her.

I told my friends on the Help Club for Moms team that I was ready to start writing for them again…

Finally, it was two days before my first deadline, and my mind was still blank. On top of that, I felt completely overwhelmed by my own kids. I sent up a quick prayer for help as I dashed off to a play date that I was sure would be a disaster. IT WAS. Total disaster. But wouldn’t you know that my God met me in that mess?

My mom just spent seven glorious weeks with us in Cape Town. We said goodbye last night, and she is on a plane back to America now. Mom stayed in the apartment connected to our house, and Benjamin asked to go to "Gosa's house" every morning as soon as he woke up….

Happy New Year! To tell you the truth, I can hardly remember the last weeks of 2022. Wyatt got strep throat, a virus and then a sinus infection. I had mastitis. My mom came in town. And we moved! My 2022 ended at 10pm because I knew 2023 was going to start early, and I was already wildly sleep-deprived. But here we are now, all settled in to a beautiful place God has provided, cherishing moments with my mom, and enjoying a Cape Town summer together. We are healthy, and the small people are finally sleeping again.

There was a lot of a lot in 2022. Here's a "Year in Review" in bullet points!

If you read our last update, you might have seen that we are fundraising to buy a family van. What you might NOT have seen is my stomach lurching and face twisting when I asked our beloved friends, family, and people of the Internet for help.

We have been sustained as missionaries in South Africa by people's giving for almost thirteen years. THIRTEEN YEARS...

Kacy: "Hey Benjamin, do you think God gave you special powers?"

Benjamin: "YESSSS!"

Kacy:"What are they?"

Benjamin: "VEGETABLES!"

Welcome to the Ladd Family Update! If you're reading this, THANK YOU. We are so grateful for a relationship with you and a few minutes of your time. We hope to hear back from you and have an opportunity to invest in you - you matter!